Oh, tech support guy
If it were up to me
I’d call you every single day
I use Windows, luckily
I love the way you roll your eyes
When I can’t find my mail
The way you make me feel small
When my Google searches fail
Oh, tech support guy
If it were up to me
I’d call you every single day
You have encrypted me
If I need some time with you
I’ll corrupt an Excel file
You lecture me with snotty tones
And all I can do is smile
Oh, tech support guy
If it were up to me
I’d call you every single day
And press your “any” key
You laugh when I try to print
Your condescending is so cute
Do you notice how I lean into you
While we watch my PC boot?
Oh, tech support guy
If it were up to me
I’d call you every single day
Please don’t delete my plea
Please plug into my open slot
The hard drive I’ve detected
I know that if we interfaced
Against viruses I’d be protected
Oh, tech support guy
If it were up to me
I’d call you every single day
Why don’t you notice me?